Thursday, August 19, 2010

Contemplate with Deacon Nate: The Family: A School of Holiness

Throughout the world today, the family is in crisis. Because the family is the fundamental building block of society, society is likewise in crisis. Anything that harms the family, harms society. On the flip side, John Paul II (JP2) says that everything that supports the family will positively affect society (Familiaris Consortio (FC), 75). How goes the family, so goes the world. What is the solution to this crisis? In a word, the Gospel. Who is the solution? Jesus Christ, whom John Paul II calls “the answer to the question that is every human life.”[1]
 
John Paul II was a champion of the family. In his prophetic writings, he repeatedly emphasizes that evangelization of and by the family is essential for the future of the Church and of the world. He exhorts the family to “become what you are…a community of life and love” (FC, 17). His words are sobering: “[t]he future of humanity passes by way of the family. It is therefore indispensable and urgent that every person of good will should endeavor to save and foster the values and requirements of the family” (FC, 86). Finally, he says, “the role of the family in building a culture of life is decisive and irreplaceable” (Evangelium Vitae, 92). This is why families must live a spirituality that fosters holiness and evangelization!

Vatican II teaches that “all the faithful, whatever their condition or state, are called” to holiness (Lumen Gentium, 11). What is holiness? It is the perfection of charity; it is becoming like God, who is love. JP2 declares that the family is the means of realizing the call to holiness (Ecclesia in America, 46)! The family is meant to be a school of holiness, love, and virtue. Everyday family life gives us PLENTY of opportunities to grow in holiness! We just have to be alert to them. To answer this call to holiness, the family must practice a genuine Christian spirituality. The term “spirituality” is derived from the New Testament and from the Holy Spirit. JP2 defines it as “‘life in Christ’ and ‘in the Spirit’, which is accepted in faith, expressed in love and inspired by hope.” Certain results flow from genuine spirituality, namely, the Holy Spirit makes us experience God and his revelation as real, leads us to surrender our lives to God, and reproduces in us the life of Christ.

Unfortunately, few models of family spirituality can be found in Christian tradition. In the past there have been perceived obstacles to holiness for the family, including the busyness of family life as well as spousal sexual relations. Are these truly obstacles? NO! On the contrary, Vatican II and JP2 teach that the married state is a “privileged place” for Christians to become holy! In his “Theology of the Body”, JP2 reveals that marital relations are meant to share in and reflect the love of the Trinity, by being free, total, faithful, and fruitful.

One model of family spirituality focuses on the roles assigned to us in baptism. In baptism, each family member shares in Christ’s priesthood, prophethood, and kingship, and has the privilege of and obligation to actively live out these roles. A family spirituality focused on these roles enables family members to overcome in themselves what JP2 calls the “separation of the Gospel from life” (Christifideles Laici, 34). This separation is spiritually dangerous (and is so much less exciting than a Gospel-soaked life!)

A priest’s role is to sanctify. Family members are called to share in Christ’s priesthood by sanctifying themselves and others. John Grabowski gives some ideas for this, including private prayer, prayer as a family, family attendance at Mass, and the offering of daily life to God.[2] Christian parents have the responsibility of educating their children in prayer (FC, 60). Paul VI challenges parents in this regard, saying, “Mothers, do you teach your children the Christian prayers? … And you, fathers, do you pray with your children… In this way you bring peace to your homes.”[3] Spontaneous prayer between spouses fosters intimacy, healing and forgiveness. Vatican II encourages families to pray the Liturgy of the Hours together. Various popes have strongly encouraged the Rosary, for Mary is “in a special way the Mother of Christian families” (FC, 61). The MOST important route to holiness is participation in the Eucharist and the other sacraments. Family visits to Jesus in the tabernacle are a powerful way to build family peace. Jesus instituted the sacrament of Penance (Confession) for the entire family, so that we might regularly hear him speak, through the priest, those peace-giving and joy-giving words “I absolve you”!

I am forever grateful that my parents actively shared in Christ’s priesthood. When I was growing up, after I climbed into bed each night, one of my parents would lay a hand on my head and pray a short blessing. This ancient Jewish practice did wonders for my faith by giving me a strong sense of God’s love. Sunday Rosary growing up was a bonding time in my family. Speaking of bonding, seasonal traditions such as the Advent Wreath Ceremony, the Jesse Tree, the weekly Lord’s Day Ceremony, and the Christian Seder Meal helped us all to encounter Jesus and grow in love for the Church and for one another.

The family actively shares in Christ’s prophethood, says Grabowski, by fidelity between members, hearing and sharing God’s Word with one another, catechesis by parents, mutual correction, forgiveness, the witness of a non-materialistic lifestyle, and evangelization. (FC, 52). JP2 states that the family “needs to be constantly and intensely evangelized” (FC, 51) and that it becomes an evangelizing community to the degree that it is evangelized (52). So, the prophetic role of the family concerns evangelization of, within, and by the family.

The parents’ mission of evangelizing and catechizing their kids is IRREPLACEABLE (FC, 36)! It should not be left up to the church, school, etc.; a great deal of evangelization and catechesis should happen within the family, the “domestic church.” To evangelize their kids, parents must highlight God’s presence in daily life and build an atmosphere of faith at home. Parents (and godparents) must model and teach the faith. They must model it, i.e., show what it means to have a relationship with Jesus, to be in love with God. This includes praying with children, as already discussed. They must teach it, i.e. talk about their faith and catechize with tools such as religious films, games, and books. The most important book, of course, is the Good Book. St. John Chrysostom says, “concern for spiritual things will unite the family …. Don’t think that it isn’t necessary for a child to listen to the Scriptures …. It is necessary for everyone to know Scriptural teachings, and this is especially true for children.”[4] They must never go it alone, but “collaborate responsibly with all the other evangelizing and catechetical activities present and at work in the ecclesial community at the diocesan and parochial levels” (FC, 53). Evangelization by parents is crucial for the fostering of healthy vocations to marriage, priesthood, and consecrated life.

Parents aren’t the only ones called to evangelize! Paul VI says that parents and children proclaim the Gospel to one another, and that “such a family becomes the evangelizer of many other families, and of the neighborhood of which it forms part” (EN, 71). By their joy and love for each other, family members witness to other family members that don’t have faith or don’t regularly practice (FC, 54). By fulfilling its vocation to love, the family “[manifests] to all people the Savior’s living presence in the world” (FC, 51). Other prophetic practices families can do together include inviting neighbors, friends, and relatives to meals, parties, holiday gatherings, parish events, Christmas caroling, etc., and praying at abortion clinics together.

In the Christian view, power and authority is not an opportunity to control or dominate, but to serve! Jesus says, “I came not to be served, but to serve.” Each family member is called to actively share in Christ’s kingship by big and small acts of self-sacrificing service within the family and society. They are called to discover the image of God and the face of Christ in every person, especially the suffering, the poor, and the weak (FC, 64). Parents should see the most mundane (and perhaps tedious) duties of parenthood, such as changing diapers, as participation in Christ’s kingship! They should serve their kids as they would serve Christ himself! There are many ways families can live their kingly role. Parents can bring their families to soup kitchens; this was a powerful way to serve Christ in the poor for me and my family. They can lovingly encourage kids to serve in the parish (e.g. volunteering at VBS) and to get involved in work camps (e.g. the Group camps) or mission trips. Vatican II says that a special kind of kingly service is leading others to the King and to his Kingdom!

If families strive to live a spirituality based on living Christ’s priesthood, prophethood, and kingship, they will answer the call to holiness and become an “intimate community of life and love” wherein “all the members evangelize and are evangelized” (FC, 17; 52). May the Holy Family intercede for all Christian families, and may the Holy Spirit draw us all into loving communion with the greatest of all families, the Holy Trinity.


[1] John Paul II, “New Evangelization Should Inspire All Your Teaching and Catechesis,” http://www.catholicculture.org/culture/library/view.cfm?recnum=324 (accessed April 16, 2010).

[2] John S. Grabowski, “Called to Holiness: Spirituality for Families in Light of Ecclesia in America.” Logos 5:4 (Fall 2002): 75-95.
[3] Paul VI, General Audience Address, Aug. 11, 1976: INSEGNAMENTI DI PAOLO VI, XIV (1976), 640.
[4] St. John Chrysostom, “Homily 21,” On Marriage and Family Life, trans. Catharine P. Roth and David Anderson (Crestwood, NY: St. Vladimir’s Seminary Press, 1986), 67.

Contemplate with Deacon Nate: Crossroads Pro-life Walk

Many people, including many Christians, don’t realize that at nearby abortion clinics, children are being killed and parents are being wounded. Many are unaware that millions of people are missing from their neighborhoods, churches, schools, etc., and that tens of thousands are legally killed daily throughout the world. The estimated number of induced abortions worldwide was 41.6 million for the year 2003 (an average of 113, 972.6 abortions per day) according to Planned Parenthood’s research organization (www.guttmacher.org/pubs/fb_IAW.html).

I was born after 1973, so my mom could have legally killed me anytime before I was born. Aware of this fact, and aware of my duty to defend “the least of my brothers and sisters”, (Mt. 25:40-46) I joined the Crossroads Pro-life Walk (Crossroadswalk.org) and walked from Chicago to Washington, D.C. in 2005 to promote the Gospel of Life in America’s culture of death.

Young people today need something to live for: a purpose, a holy cause to fight for, to sweat, bleed, and die for. More importantly, they need someBODY to live for: Jesus Christ. Crossroads Pro-life Walk was started in 1995 by a group of Franciscan University students who live for Jesus. They decided to take literally the words of John Paul II at World Youth Day in Denver in 1993, when he challenged the youth “to go out into the streets and into public places, like the first Apostles” and to build a culture of life.  So, these zealous students decided to walk from San Francisco to Washington D.C.! Along the way offered prayers and sacrifices for an end to the culture of death. They spread the Gospel of Life to everyone they met. When they encountered post-abortive women, they prayed for them and directed them to places of healing. Unbeknownst to them, they were beginning a glorious tradition that would save the lives and change the hearts of countless Americans in future years.

Because of work I couldn’t join the northern route (Seattle to D.C.) until they were in Chicago. We had a day shift and a night shift, and each of those shifts had two shifts. For example, day shift would be about six people, and three would walk five miles while the other three rested in the support van. When the first three reached the van, the other three would walk, while the first three would drive up five miles to rest and wait. Each individual would walk 15-20 miles per day; the entire team, day shift plus night shift, would cover 70-80 miles per day. We wore T-shirts with “PRO-LIFE” in big letters. Most of the time, people driving by would give us positive affirmation, such as a thumbs-up’s; we were persecuted only rarely. Because of the shirts, our mere presence was a powerful witness in countless businesses, stores, gas stations, restaurants, etc., at which the Holy Spirit inspired many to talk to us. For every five miles, we would pray one Rosary (the “weapon” against Satan according to St. Padre Pio). In the morning, we’d all gather for Mass, breakfast, and plenty of laughter at the crazy things that often happened.

Instead of walking on weekends, we’d split up into Mass groups of two to three people and visit as many parishes as possible, to speak to congregations after Mass and ask for three things: prayer, participation in the pro-life struggle, and donations. Sometimes we’d pray and counsel women in front of local abortion clinics. Host families, rectories, religious communities, and our sweltering RV provided sleeping quarters. We relied totally on God’s providence through his people for food, gas, and shelter and he came through big time, of course! We were given so many random gifts, such as gas money, by many beautiful people.

Part of the “redemptive suffering” was foot issues, especially blisters. The “miracle box” provided all we needed to repair, bind, disinfect, wrap, tourniquet, or amputate our feet (OK, I’m exaggerating). But infinitely more important than the “miracle box” was the “miracle food” of Jesus in the Eucharist that we received every day at Mass. Thanks to God’s providence, including the fantastic Masstimes.org, we missed Mass only three-ish times in 11 weeks!

In Chicago, my group attended a Mass offered by an enthusiastic Spanish-speaking polish priest named Fr. Stephen. Although I couldn’t understand all the Spanish, the message was obvious: Jesus is ALIVE on earth! He began his homily by saying that “la remedia” for life’s loneliness, pain, etc, is not in drugs, booze, video games, etc; it’s in Jesus, present personally, though invisibly, in the tabernacle! He called the children up by the altar and had them repeat after him: “When I’m tired, lonely, sad, (etc) I’ll talk to Jesus.”  Next, the children lined up and eagerly kissed the tabernacle!

We drank in much beauty on our walk, including millions of fireflies at night, flashing like cameras in a packed stadium. We enjoyed a variety of terrain, such as swamps, forest, bean fields, houses, small towns, etc. At night, crickets and frogs cheered us on. Praying the Rosary and divine mercy chaplet in the peace of the night was glorious.

We met so many wonderful people. Highlights include Archbishop (now Cardinal) Sean O’Malley in Boston, Archbishop John Myers in Newark, and Fr. Charles Connor (host of an EWTN show) in Scranton, all of whom offered Mass for our group. On Staten Island, we met Fr. Frank Pavone at his office, who told us, “To be pro-choice is to be anti-choice, because many women who abort feel they have no other choice.” This zealous priest often says we’re working FROM victory, not FOR victory, since Christ won the victory over death. We must claim it!

I really enjoyed getting to know my fellow walkers as we chatted along the roads. One of the walkers has an incredible story, similar to St. Gianna’s: while his mom was pregnant with him, she could’ve taken the doctor’s advice and aborted him, since she need chemo. But she loved her son more than herself, refused chemo, gave birth, and died. “There is no greater love…”  

Other highlights: while praying with the Friars of the Renewal at one of NY’s busiest abortion clinics, at least three kids’ lives were saved that day, and three mothers’ lives were spared from a lifetime (or perhaps longer) of regret. Meeting the NY Sisters of Life was inspiring. They provide everything a poor, single mother might need to raise her baby. Because of their outreach, women are choosing life, converting from sin, and going to Mass and Eucharistic Adoration! 

The late Fr. John Hardon, S.J. says, “The future of the pro-life movement throughout the world depends on the Roman Catholic Church.” The Church faithfully hands on the revealed truth that human life is sacred because every person is made in God’s image and thus deserving of respect from conception to natural death. The Church’s teaching on contraception is also crucial for the building of a culture of life. Pope Paul VI in Humanae Vitae made four predictions about what would happen if Church teaching on this matter was ignored, and tragically, every prediction has come to pass. These fulfilled predictions are all aspects of the culture of death. Because the contraceptive mentality leads to the abortive mentality (many “contraceptives” can even cause early abortion), abortion will not end until the contraceptive mentality is replaced with the “openness to life” mentality. How then are couples supposed to exercise responsible parenthood, as the Church teaches they must? The Church has beautiful teachings about this, and many couples have experienced transformation in their marriages and families when they embrace these morally acceptable methods.

Only a superabundance of God’s grace will defeat abortion, so let’s pray for this intention daily. But let’s do more than pray, if we’re able to: let’s ask the Lord what he wants us do to protect “the least of our brothers and sisters.” Whatever we do, we must do it with prudence and love, for “love conquers all”!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Contemplate with Deacon Nate: Praying Constantly

M.C. Hammer has a song with the chorus, "You got to pray, just to make it today!" This statement reminds me of St. Paul's exhortation to "pray constantly" (1 Thes 5:16-18). Does St. Paul mean that we must be reciting prayers every second of every minute of every hour? Not necessarily. He is encouraging us to keep in communication, in holy communion, with God throughout each day.

As an illustration, imagine that your entire life was experienced through facebook (for some this may not be difficult to imagine, sadly). In this case, to "pray constantly" would be to constantly have open chat windows to the Father, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, Mother Mary, and any saints that are on your "friends" list! You aren't constantly chatting with them, but the chat windows are open. Just like in facebook, it feels good just to know that these heavenly friends are "online" and ready and eager to listen to you at any time, to listen to your thoughts, feelings, desires, plans, etc., and to respond to you in various, sometimes unexpected, ways.

Sometimes the Lord shows me that certain events or objects can be great reminders to pray; here are some prayer reminders:
-Difficult/obnoxious people: pray for the grace to be charitable to them
-People in uniform: Say a quick prayer for them, e.g. "Jesus, please surround this soldier with angels to protect him physically and spiritually, Amen!"
-Religious statues and images: pray a quick prayer to the person or angel represented, e.g. when you see a statue of St. Michael, pray the St. Michael prayer
-Ambulances and sirens: pray for those who may be injured or in danger
-Clocks/watches: at 3:00pm, the hour of Jesus' death, thank him for his sacrifice. Also, you could close your eyes for 30 seconds and visualize him on the cross for love of you, or pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet, or visit Jesus in the tabernacle, etc. Jesus told St. Faustina that he would grant special graces if we pray during this hour, the "Hour of Mercy"
-"Made in China" stickers: pray for the persecuted Church in China
-The news: "pray the news" when you hear about disasters, etc.; pray especially for those who've died
-The wind: when you notice the wind, say a quick prayer to the Breath of God, e.g "Come Holy Spirit"
-Brushing your teeth: pray prayers posted on your mirror, e.g. a list of people who need prayer
-Experiencing pain: tell Jesus you love him and offer him your pain, e.g. imitate Jesus and pray "Father, let this cup pass me by, but not my will but thine be done"; also you can pray for those who suffer in the same way, e.g. when you get a headache, pray for all who have a headache
-Experiencing beauty: when you notice beauty present in a person, in nature, or in art, thank and praise God
-Waking up: pray the traditional "Morning Offering": "O Jesus, through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, I offer you all my prayers, works, joys, and sufferings of this day, in union with the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass through out the world today, in reparation for my sins, for the intentions of my relatives and friends, and in particular for the intentions of the Holy Father, Amen!"

I find many prayer reminders while driving. When I pass by certain things, I often turn off the radio briefly to say a quick prayer. Here are some prayer reminders while on the road:
-Catholic Churches: as you pass a Church, cross yourself, turn your mind to Jesus in the tabernacle of that Church, and pray, "Jesus, I believe you are present in the tabernacle there; thank You for your presence," or this traditional prayer, "O Sacrament most Holy, O Sacrament Divine, all praise and all thanksgiving, be every moment thine" (if you have time, stop in for a quick visit to the tabernacle!)
-Hospitals: you can ask the Divine Physician to heal and comfort everyone inside, and to prepare the dying to meet him
-Abortion Clinics, Strip Clubs, Adult Bookstores, Hooters Restaurants, etc.: pray the St. Michael Prayer for the conversion of the customers, employees and owners, and be careful not to have a judgmental attitude when you pray
-Graveyards: pray for the repose of the souls, e.g. "May they rest in the peace of Christ"
-People who cut you off in traffic: pray for them (after all, Jesus commands us to pray for our enemies!)

A powerful, ancient way to pray constantly is to recite the "Jesus prayer": "Lord Jesus Christ, son of the living God, have mercy on me, a sinner." I pray this sometimes when I'm walking from place to place. It's a great way to connect with Jesus in the down times of the day. Or, pray the rosary or divine mercy chaplet. Or, you can simply repeat the holy names of Jesus and Mary, with love and devotion.

These are a few ideas; if you have any more please email them to me (nateharburg@gmail.com). St. Paul's words to the Thessalonians are God's words to each of us, today: "Rejoice always, pray constantly, give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you" (1 Thes 5:16-18).

"Dear Father, please show us how to pray constantly. Send your Spirit and our guardian angels to remind us to pray throughout each day. Thank you for hearing our prayer and answering it in your perfect way, in Jesus' Mighty name, Amen."